Any material to diffuse arguments before they turn physical

cal8116 wrote:

wear those handcuffs that go from your hands to your feet? either that or glue ur hand to ur cock then you wont consider ''knocking somone through a car windshield''... also if somone was planning to '' pre emptivly strike'' that would surgest you were going to strike them hence it being 'pre' - 'emptive' , as for never losing a fight... maybe you need to, it might strip off some of that ego. you came from a long line of fighters eh? but you say you were brought up in institutions? how would you know that then? i mean i guess its possible but is it probable? if your fore fathers were fighters it doesnt make you a fighter, it might make you an agressive lout or more prown to addictive behavior but fighting is somthing learned and taught... altho i could be totally wrong *sits in the corner pondering*

Funny!
I totally disagree: fighters are born, not made.Age old debate, but genes have it. 95% is mental. Take young Richie, comes from a GOOD FAMILY, GETS RUMBLED AND TRAINS TO FIGHT. wHAT MADE HIM IS BRAINS and braun. If you breed a dog to attack, you select a breed that is sharp and go from there.

This is just something I had nearly forgotten about but that worked well enough when I did it. And this diffused the fight a split second before it went physical so I thought I'd mention it.

Me and a friend is walking from the pub after closing time. Because of some silly posturing-stuff we manage to get the dubious attention of a couple of guys looking for a fight. So as we're walking down the street one guy comes sort of dancing/sidestepping to my left in front of me, clearly up to no good but not "announcing" it just yet. The other guy stands a few yards back on my right side.

Having read a lot about fighting and the social stuff surrounding it (mostly from Marc MacYoung's books) plus remembering that I saw the same guy earlier that day pissing into an elevator in a mall (rebellion against authority?) as I walked by, I semi-instinctively shake hands with the guy, saying "you're that guy who was pissing in that elevator earlier" as if he must be a really cool guy, and I told him I had done the same thing too and although I had barely heard about NLP at the time I realize in hindsight that this worked like a pattern interrupt, breaking that fighting-state he was working himself into and changing the subject while creating some good rapport as well.

Just as I had done that the other guy comes in from behind grabbing me by the jacket, but the "alpha" so to speak that I introduced myself to breaks it up saying "he's cool" and we ended up walking around with those guys the rest of the night. I think it was pretty good for a guy not having a clue what he was doing...

USM

Quote :

That dude was loaded, I was still sober and I know I could have destroyed him.... I tend to let people run their mouths and I walk away.

To keep yourself from beating yourself dude, you might pat yourself on the back and say to yourself" Oh man, I just saved a man's life, I could have destroyed him if I chose to, man, he doesn't know how lucky he is !"

Hmmm, I have the same problem chatting up women....Richie was kind enough to email me a "foo foo " dance spell for confidence...I'm gonna buy his verbal confrontation CD...and ...when Richie finally comes out with his Converted p of v, verbal threat, supratstate CDs for male confidence with women.. Ka Ching

Psychology in violent interactions or in romantic interactions..They are still forms of social interactions

W

Hi Warren

My stepdad is amazing when it comes to diffusing angry and violent people. He's one of those that just scare the shit out of people just by looking at them.

A while ago some lads were breaking into a car, and my mom being the way she is, went over to confront them about it, and they were all getting in her face, poking her. I know poking isn't much, but that will escalate into shoving, then an attack if it is allowed. Anyway it didn't bother her, but she can't take on that many people. My stepdad saw this and started to walk over to them, and they spotted him and as soon as they saw him they all just turned and ran, shitting themselves.

Can this demeanor be learnt, or is it just natural to certain people?

its natural to all animals ben, try walking purposefully towards a cat or dog and it will bounce out of the way even if it knows you... honestly it wouldnt matter how somone looked if they walked straight at me with true purpose and real intent I would be looking to backpedal!

I think its a genetic response, it would be hard (and foolish) to rewire it adn we can be aware of it and use it to our advantage.

To diffuse an argument just say "Listen, if you dont shut your pathetic useless consumption hole. Guess what. I'm going to crack you're skull wide open like a melon, and when you get out of your coma. I think I'll do it again just to prove a point, bitch."

hahaha, yeah that would work totally.

Hi Richard, has the 3rd verbal conflict cd been released yet?

Unless I'm mistaken here, that would be the "offensive psychology" CD.

RichardB wrote:

Unless I'm mistaken here, that would be the "offensive psychology" CD.

ok thanks, i didn't realise that was what it is called.

Hey guys! Listen USM.....keep walking away.......dont let your ego get hurt.....i am a Combatives instructor and believe me, I could devastate practically 95% of people(there is always that 5% that could fuck you up ) ......but i try to defuse the situation and act through the whole thing......"hey man i dont want any trouble" or "sorry bro, let me buy you a beer".....just simply play a role and let things go....use that situation and argument as a drill for building your slills in awareness, defusing fights, target selection, pre-assault cues, reading body language, preemptive striking, geesh the list goes on and on :-) ......think of it as a game and see what things you can say....or stand there and let him say what he has to say and meanwhile you are thinking to yourself, "ok his weight is on his left leg, i could blow out his knee"...."i could go right to a choke then to head control, to an arm lock takedown"......play the scenario out in your head......this will also mentally prepare you in future situations......good luck!


stay safe, train hard