There was a lot of good stuff in there. I have a suggestion about the stop button though. Shouldn't there be some more or less clear triggers for it?
I.e., you'd want to stop brutalizing someone because... you want to stay legal, maybe even within some ethical limits of your own, or whatever. Laws of course, vary. But in general it seems to be about doing it as nicely as you can afford. (take control that is). So that you have a sweet spot between not doing enough and doing too much. Never nicer that you can tactically afford, and never beyond the point where you have control. (such as stomping his head in after he's unconscious and on the ground).
This means you're trying to do something specific to the guy, so it affects the process further down as well. As far as I've been able to sort it out, violence isn't about injuring or not injuring but about taking control of the guy, in the sense that you can prevent him from doing stuff. The level of injury just reflects that it would be tactically irresponsible to risk being nicer. In short, the trigger for the stop button is the point where you have the control you need. Wether you've knocked the man unconscious, locked him in a hold or stomped his skull in.
In NLP terms that means you'd need to work out what you'd see, hear and feel after having acheied that outcome, right?
These are just some stray thoughts that could probably use some more refinement but they seem important so I thought I'd just throw it in here.