- Quote :
- Sergei, you said you were being very anti social. Its funny you mentioned that. Just today I caught myself frowning at friendly people trying to talk to me because I was thinking of violent thoughts
Ok you just scared me
Guys Ive been watching this thread and saying nothing because I want you to find your own solutions between yourselves and your doing well- but I have to interject here on behalf of people new to the forum and new to some of the SFS products and on behalf of YOUR mental health
its time to stop- the techniques in the NLP series will make you moody and confrontational as Ive repeatedly warned: YOU MUST NOW BALANCE THESE WITH THE OTHER MORE POSITIVE TECHNIQUES DISCUSSED ON THE CD
the last thing I want is people scowling and trying to create violent thoughts when interacting with people being friendly
John, in no sense am I trying to make you wrong- EVERYONE DOES THIS... but now Im suggesting to you that you need to make a commitment to doing some new techniques as well
Much of the need to "learn to fight" and study "sef protection" comes at root from feeling threatened and insecure... if we didnt feel threatened at some point why would we be spending hours and hours of our lives banging the crap out of human shaped pads???
We need to be honest with ourselves...
Now in order not to descend into some kind of sociopathic Travis Bickle revenge fantasy nightmare lifestyle (see Scorceses Taxi Driver- you know: RObert de Niro practising kicking off in the mirror) we need to get out of ourselves once in a while
You need to balance these violent murderous visualistations with something a bit happier, cheerier
at the risk of sounding like Dale Carnegie and ANthony Robbins inbred love child, here is your homework:
-smile at people you dont know when walking down the street- try saying "good morning" I know its old fashioned but its a fine British tradition and we should bring it back
-offer to help an oldie out- with shopping, crossing the road- whatever- just do it or I will hunt you down and beat you
-try making friends with someone- look, I know its very American/European to strike up conversations on public transport but we really need to get out of the darkness here-
I am big and brave enough to be prepared to feel a bit daft, are you?-pick out someone you think looks scary, or a gang of chavs, whatever... go into a good state... then go over and ask them something in a really friendly way, anything... the time, a cash machine a bus stop whatever-
use your common sense of course- you may well be surprised to see that tattooed scarred face break into a smile as they are only too happy to help... or not... so what? move on
A big part of your self protection training is your capacity to build rapport with people quickly and easily- that has always been and will always be FAR FAR FAR more important than any "fighting" techniques
I believe in Karma, and I believe we get what we train for, what we practise, what we visualise... the point of the NLP cds is to make you more effective IF you get into a fight... NOT to get you into more fights
Walk around scowling and thinking violent thoughts around people and some desperate alpha male wannabe will smell it and you will be scrapping
Be "Professional"
its such a good word... you dont have to be "nice" you dont have to be a pushover... be in control of yourself and the uncoscious messages you are sending out
Think about the implications of that one little linguistic reframe- what does being a "Professional" imply?
So go out in the world with a
clearer chosen definition of yourself:
do you want to be a "fighter"? a "martial artist"? an "SP practitioner"?
a "tactical urban ninja"? a "bouncer"? a "hardcase"?
-- how boring and limiting is that?
God, I wouldnt even want to hang around people who defined themselves like that let alone be one... would you?
Find a new self definition. Dont give in and buy into the "fear reality" myth that is being promulgated by modern media... the vast majority of people are essentially good and the world is a pretty place.
Put the "Psychology of Violence" cds to one side for a week and spend 7 days visualising positive things occuring- I know I told you to do that already, but have you?