yanks one, limeys nil

I wasnt going to say anything the first few times this happened, but its just happened again... twice... so fluff it I will report as I find.


Im dimly aware from my watching of american news and my sister who I think is now a "naturalised american" or something, almost a citizen, but only for 10 years, whatever ... that there is a certain sentiment of self loathing abroad in americans

Ive heard stories of travelling americans pretending to be canadians through shame and /or being worried about the flak they might get- there is a feeling that americans arent popular abroad

well

this might warm the cockles of yer colonial hearts: since Ive been in the thailand, 5 people have asked me if im a septic tank (yank, keep up), the reason- coz Im polite innit


and I have to say in comparison to the brit scumbags you get here, the seppos (short for septic tank, keep up) are a bloody sight nicer than the shaven headed, tattood, gobshite tiface wankstain twats that have been scraped from the bottom of british society that turn up here

I have a theory... a lot of seppos who come here are coming back and came originally after being stationed here, they are ex military (its the hawaian shirts, moustaches and cigars that give it away- what is it with US navy and hawaian shirts???)

where as the brits who are here are here because, I dunno, maybe they killed someone and need to lay low or something

I was in patong 2 weeks ago and some US navy ships were docked, now I know that they had the extra disciplining factor of superior officers drifting around and mp's but what a thoroguhly decent bunch they are (considering they are basically a pack of young men who have been let off the leash for just a few nights and want to get shitfaced, they were really well behaved)

more than that they seem to get thai people: respect the space, smile, dont shout at them, dont swear at them, dont grab them... oh and dont throw bottles at them... yeah they frown on that... I found on my second night when a 55 year old brit chucked a beer bottle at a bar girl. Nice. He was on a golf holiday. Probably has a wife and kids at home. Would be a shame to get stabbed or jailed so far from home wouldnt it eh? Silly sausage.

I thought WE Brits were the posh polite ones? (dont you know dont you know) Didnt we used to be renowned for almost japanese levels of social courtesy?

its an effing disgrace what you see here, we are not well liked.

Loud obnoxious ignorant drunks with no manners, if you hear of a fight or a problem, its usually a brit. Its a bloody shame.

Anyway, there you go.

Americans are known for being the polite ones here.

Like I say I think its skewed as a lot of seppos (not all) are ex or serving military (which must surely help a bit) and the poms (brits, keep up) just seem to be the kind of scum I used to enjoy bashing of a weekend.

And would gladly do again.

Bloody shameful behaviour, they need keelhauling.

Then tonight, even an Irish guy asked me if I was a Seppo.

"Why" asks I

"You look American" says he

"What rot" says I
twiddling with my back to front baseball cap, chewing gum with my gob open and pulling up my "gangsta" hang jeans so low you can see my undergarments

( i kid i kid)

seriously in plain jeans and tshirt , how do you "look" american?

There you have it my yankee cuzzes, in some parts you are known for courtesy, thats something to be proud of.

May this go a tiny way to balance the self loathing, I heard them chat about it only today on fox news (In reference to sarah palin, they were saying that she was a proud brilliant example of the american spirit that counterbalanced the tendency for self loathing. Im not making it up. She was mishandled during the campaign, thats all, they said. Thats pretty much verbatim. Really. I wouldnt have the balls to make that up.)

Dont worry, I watch it only to see how very, very stupid people get their information about the world.


And for the inbred looking one who used to commentate on the UFC:

"Bell rings! Nnngggh, loud noises! Man hit man! Man fall down! oh oh! he make red water from he nose come, ur, ur, poor man, he go sleep now... ur, ur, ur!"


I get sadistic pleasure watching him struggle to read words off the autocue longer than 3 syllables...


"go fuck yourself san diego"

That was nice... it did make me feel better...


I have been a bit pissed lately at the self loathing of our society fueled by worthless politicians that have the integrity of a snake oil salesman and the backbone of a squid.


On a side note I resemble your remark... Backwards hat and one of my sources is fox news along with democracy now, cnn, msnbc, bbc, various papers and the net. One thing I can say about fox is that they are far more balanced than any other news organization here in the states. At least on domestic issues. They all have a slant, they all seem to have an agenda.

does anyone wonder if it varies according to the country and our [yanks; pommies; aussies; kiwis; etc]
sensibilities for the host country?

i had a whole joke brewing about bonobos vs. chimps; the fookers vs. the fornicators; blood circulation in
the head vs. blood circulation in the nether regions--then i remembered dear old dad [Hard core Brit with
his pants perpetually down, and his fists always half clenched] who broke my theory to shreds

i reckon if you stay there long enough, you'll see things balance out
props to limies and yankies; poo to us both as well

LOVED THE READ
TAH FOR THAT
I'LL READ IT AGAIN BEFORE THE END OF THE NIGHT
JUST NOW MY ECCENTRIC SON IS WHISPERING LOUDLY--IF THAT IS POSSIBLE, TO COME OVER
WHILST HE FEIGNS TRYING NOT TO WAKE HIS SISTER, WHO MAY HAVE JUST WOKE UP

HE'S ALL THEATRICAL LIKE HIS M...uhm can't say
THEN THERE MY LITTLE GIRL, WHO'LL SMILE TILL YOU GET CLOSE, THEN SLAP YOU IN THE FACE LIKE
A SAILOR AND EAT ALL THE FOOD FROM YOUR PLATE [AT 1 YEAR], AND SHE'S LIKE, WELL...YOU KNOW

Ritchie, thanks. Been laughing for 5 minutes at your post & Roadkill, even funnier. "Fox" & "balanced" in the same sentence, priceless.

Hope you are flying the flag. Your almost putting me off going. I cannot stand brit yobs abroad. Both package tours I took to Spain were really embarrassing. I hated the second one Llloret de Mar so much I spent the final 9 days of twelve, staying in a pension in Barcelona. Now there is a nice city.

i guess it's not a good time to 'shave yor 'ed and sport your favorite football club, eh?'



amidst screams of,
"give'm tha boot"
"oogie oogie oogie"

Very nice Mr Grannon.

Sorry to gob off about the philippines again, but when you get there, there should be a lot less of the young yobbish types. But plenty of old, fat, balding managerial types (for some reason). Mostly Brit and Aussie I found.

I also saw a few of those mustaches and Hawaiian shirts too... except I think they were US SF. There was a collaborative 'exercise' there at the time between the Filipino and US special forces. They tried to blend in, bless em, but it was those mustaches and hyper-alert eyes that gave the game away

Richard Grannon wrote:

I have a theory... a lot of seppos who come here are coming back and came originally after being stationed here, they are ex military (its the hawaian shirts, moustaches and cigars that give it away- what is it with US navy and hawaian shirts???)

where as the brits who are here are here because, I dunno, maybe they killed someone and need to lay low or something





And for the inbred looking one who used to commentate on the UFC:

"Bell rings! Nnngggh, loud noises! Man hit man! Man fall down! oh oh! he make red water from he nose come, ur, ur, poor man, he go sleep now... ur, ur, ur!"


I get sadistic pleasure watching him struggle to read words off the autocue longer than 3 syllables...


"go fuck yourself san diego"

i keep re'reading this, me a slow reader and all
...must stop reading this it is a major source of snot-spurtage

Blakops wrote:

Ritchie, thanks. Been laughing for 5 minutes at your post & Roadkill, even funnier. "Fox" & "balanced" in the same sentence, priceless.

Ok Blackops:

Which of the following are balanced? Educate me...

MSNBC

CNN

ABC

CNBC

roadkill wrote:

Blakops wrote:

Ritchie, thanks. Been laughing for 5 minutes at your post & Roadkill, even funnier. "Fox" & "balanced" in the same sentence, priceless.

Ok Blackops:

Which of the following are balanced? Educate me...

MSNBC

CNN

ABC

CNBC

I know you didn't ask me, but...

They all suck in my humble feather-ruffling opinion But I think you know where I stand on mainstream news. Don't make me put that tinfoil hat back on

I was actually just trying to ruffle some feathers and I didn't even get a nibble. I know fox is as far right as you can get. As I said before they all have their slant and seem to have an agenda.

I've been busy.

Man of your advanced years should know when I'm only joking, Roadkill!

In answer to your question, none of the above. I would like to know if world coverage on American news has changed since the last time I was out there, I mean is there any? I remember watching international news, cant remember what network, when I was in Florida on holiday, 18 years ago. It never left the Continental United States. I genuinely got the impression that the rest of the world was a myth perpetuated by anarchists

As someone brought up watching the BBC, it was quite bewildering. Didn't seem to have changed much when I last went 5 years ago.

what do you think? Any improvement.

Oh, & you cant lure me in. I am a wily old pike, wise to the game of those who would catch me.

Pretentious, Moi!?!

met nice chap from Cali in the gym last night who lived here for 5 years and knows all the seppos

my theory that they are all ex military is apparently bollocks (feel even betterer Roadkill, they are just normal Americans with no SF "winnings hearts and minds" trainings!)

the truth is probably closer to Russ's idea that its horses for courses, certain types of Brits come here, certain types of Americans come here

anyway it doesnt do to generalise:

ecountered some dreadfully rude Russians today

and I was elected judge of some kangaroo court last night (I was bushwhacked I was just sat in the bar of my hotel havin a g+t, dont you know dont you know) of a japanese "customer" who ... dun, dun, DUUUUN... took photos of a girl without permission

he was shoved towards me by a pretty aggressive group of bargirls, bashfully gave me his camera (I was elected expert as I own a laptop and therefore am deemed to be a technical wizard) and I was ordered to check (using my special foreign persons eyes) if there was any pictures on his camera of naked thai ladies

which I did, it was all gettin a bit serious, loads of people turned up and they were gettin a bit aggro with him, but I felt a right twat checkin this lads camera

afterwards

I intoned gravely "in light of the defendants repentant demanour, hic... and due to a lack of truly conclussshive evidenshe in this case I feel I have no other opssshun, hic, than declare this case unworthy of my lofty jusdgementsssh"

"We call police or not?" demand the angry ladyfolk

"No, he not have picture." I say with weary shake of my responsibility laden head whilst trying not to fall off the stool and keep a serious face on (I'd been only been out the gym an hour, it was really hot and I had rehydrated with Gordon's)

I saw another side here last night though, bit of a DIY justice and mob rule vibe was in the air.

I think they sort of wanted me to find pics of her bum on the camera to have an excuse for a bit of the old dirty twenty to one-

I joke, I dunno what they really would have done, maybe they are a bit bored and feed off the drama?


An American journalist in Bali wrote to me yesterday with some advice on Indonesia and it sounds like a similar scene.

He mentioned that MMA fighter chappy who got in a scrap there, said he broke many a rule for (not) scrapping in the East.

All about context eh? Social intelligence more powerful than the most Fedor-esque over hand right.

Ritchie, these are very entertaining, keep em coming if you have the time.

Glad to know that you are fair & reasonable magistrate, expect our japanese friend was much relieved.

Blakops wrote:

I would like to know if world coverage on American news has changed since the last time I was out there, I mean is there any?

No... We are still being force feed someone else's diet filled with luke warm regurgitated propaganda and sprinkled with Hollywood slime.





Richie: Please do continue reporting your travels..

roadkill wrote:

Blakops wrote:

I would like to know if world coverage on American news has changed since the last time I was out there, I mean is there any?

No... We are still being force feed someone else's diet filled with luke warm regurgitated propaganda and sprinkled with Hollywood slime.





Richie: Please do continue reporting your travels..

how are you today, phil? hale & hearty I hope.

Been reading your contrib on the weapons thread on the other forum, good questions. Re-iterates to a degree what was said on sharifs vid knife offense thread.

Quote :

I'd been only been out the gym an hour, it was really hot and I had rehydrated with Gordon's

tut tut

(in my best Borat voice) Naughty, naughty!

Richard Grannon wrote:

he was shoved towards me by a pretty aggressive group of bargirls, bashfully gave me his camera (I was elected expert as I own a laptop and therefore am deemed to be a technical wizard) and I was ordered to check (using my special foreign persons eyes) if there was any pictures on his camera of naked thai ladies

I intoned gravely "in light of the defendants repentant demanour, hic... and due to a lack of truly conclussshive evidenshe in this case I feel I have no other opssshun, hic, than declare this case unworthy of my lofty jusdgementsssh"

"We call police or not?" demand the angry ladyfolk

I think they sort of wanted me to find pics of her bum on the camera to have an excuse for a bit of the old dirty twenty to one-

me think big handsome pommie boy right

you sure there no picture big boy




'yeah, i'm sure

'can i have my camera back now

'hang on, maybe there is a picture

'okay okay, you keep the camera

'oh, thanks mate, that's awfully kind of you, now could you
buy these nice ladies a drink

Now since he is the savvy American looking tech guy at a bar... Maybe he downloaded these pics onto his laptop... Hmm there is another thought.... who takes their laptop to a bar in Thailand?

I tried explaining that if he wanted to by the time they had the debate the pics could be on a remote pic hosting site ( oh the scandal! she'll never be able to look her mother in the face again!) and even off his laptop by now, they were saying the police would come and seize his laptop, which I doubt they would have- they are desperate for tourists this year (their slowest in 5 years) and trouble with the japanese embassy isnt going to help

uh... they know I have a lap top because the girls who work in the bar of my hotel also clean my room

yes, its a strange place thailand all lines are blurred!


even the lines between traffic and pedestrians, but more on that another day