I'M NOT MAKING THIS UP:

i generously accepted my mother-in-law's invite to a japonese-themed tea house
that serves food. i get my usual boring curry or burger whenever i can find it...my
family is a wee bit more adventuresome.

after our meal/and drink--my wife and my motherinlaw wanted to look in the overpriced
gift shop...which was my que to wisk my son up the block and not get stuck inside a
8 by 6 cube of overpriced and pretentious products.

to make it short, the most hilarious over priced item
was a chocolate bar flavoured:
"SMOKED SALTY BACON FLAVOURED CHOCOLATE"

others were pushing the usual ginseng and ginger stuff that doesn't belong in chocolate
but at least isn't revolting.

since when did we start mixing the meal with the desert anyway. i was asking--because i have
no class, if there was one flavoured with vomit or should i just provide that myself?



it gave me fond memories [though] of sausage and tomato crisps, etc...which america
doesn't serve.

anyway, the place is called

TEA'ISM, after 'TAO'ISM' and tries to win over people who wouldn't otherwise eat their food
i reckon. you know the sort that probably doesn't like sex either and needs props like toilet
seats and whistles and red paint

i had to swallow my inner hooligan--and not laugh, as i was just treated to lunch after all.

You know they make bacon flavored whiskey now too ...... absolutely true.

dear god

i'm already used to the different teas. i grew up knowing about chai, and sort of accepted
all the minor contaminants--yak pee and head cheese with cinnamon, etc...

but bacon whiskey--that's like drinking my dad's breath

or perhaps his spit